Browns Win Again. Confusion Overwhelms Region.

 

I'm sorry that this column was written a little later than normal.  The problem was I have spent the last 12 hours, mouth agape, staring blankly ahead trying to figure out how the Browns are 3-1.  I refuse to believe the team is "good" in a traditional sense.  Yet, the Patriots weren't that good last year and circumstance took them to the Super Bowl.  It's hard to make any sense out of the season so far.  I have photographs nailed to my wall with yarn connecting key points all in the aim of having any of this puzzle come together in a way I can understand.

The team keeps winning.  Look, you can only beat who they put on your schedule and the Browns have reeled off three in a row for the first time since Otto Graham.  It might have been after that but I didn't feel like looking it up.  Remember, I am sitting in a room with foil over the windows with the floor covered in newspaper clippings trying to debunk that this is happening.  I don't have time to chase false leads.  My gut feeling is that Tampa/Carolina might be bad, and Pittsburgh is sort of the same team as the Browns so you'll go 50/50 in those games.  The thing is the Browns schedule is not that challenging, so if you're not careful "hope" can seep into your thinking.  I can make a legit argument for 10 wins, though I can't see that happening.  Beat the Jets next week to go 4-1, and suddenly the Browns have some real momentum.  It will require rearranging my mind, but that's where we are right now.

I still hate Watson.  Watson played well.  He was good.  There's no denying it.  But...  I keep having these gross feelings watching Watson succeed and celebrating.  I'm not alone in this either.  I enjoy hearing the awkward announcing as the sportcasters keep referring to his... troubles... as if he kept having a car breakdown on the way to practice as opposed to a couple dozen sexual assault claims that he had to pay off and then showed no remorse about.  Also, if you saw the pregame interview with Taylor Rooks, I kept feeling like she had organized a "safe word" with the off camera producer due to how uncomfortable she appeared in the segment.  Based on the cheering fans yesterday, Watson is winning some people over though.  It does just show you that if Hitler had a good breaking ball, Yankee fans would have gladly cheered him on as a Game 2 starter in the 1946 World Series.  "Yeah I don't like that mustache of his, and there's all kinds of talk about him doing some bad stuff, but his curve drops off the fucking table!".  Now, I'm not saying Watson is as bad as Hitler, but to make my point I used Hitler because this image of him in a Yankees uniform sort of popped into my head.  Now I have that to deal with too.  I just look at Watson and feel queasy.  Sort of makes it tough to celebrate the team's success, ya know?

Maybe Stefanski really WAS the problem.  The Browns are moving the ball, making interesting play calls, and seem genuinely enthusiastic about being there.  That corporate blandness that Stefanski saw as a strength, playing not to lose instead of to win, and just sucking the life out of the room might be a valid reason why the team didn't succeed.  Monken is a traditional Browns hire where they pendulum back and forth between "analytical guy" to "football guy".  They might have stumbled into something with Monken who is coaching this thing like a guy with house money on a 48 hour bender in Vegas.  He was as pissed as everyone watching at home when Shitsmick kicked the ensuing kickoff after the winning FG into the end zone to give the Steelers at least a prayer of getting into position to try a tie breaker.  Stefanski would have stared ahead and given a monotone "that's on me" when it clearly was a player fuckup.  Monken gave a refreshing tapestry of profanity on the sideline instead.  I already like Monken more than Stefanski and it's only been a month.  

Are the Browns good or do their opponents suck?  I am leaning into the idea that the team is better than The Public thinks it is, but not as good as Browns sports talk caller guy thinks.  Browns/Steelers/Colts/Jets/Raiders/Packers/Saints all seem to be about the same team as of this writing.  They clearly aren't as good as the Chiefs/Rams/Seahawks/Bears/Bills type teams, but have been able to get out of the basement where the Titans/Dolphins/Cardinals/Bucs/Chargers are living right now.  This is all one can ask of the Browns in 2026.  If they can put a team on the field that has a legit shot to win in 13 of the 17 weeks, I can get faithfully tune in and make snarky comments.  I was not down to trudge through a season like the Dolphins are about to do.         

The Browns have the ugliest fan base in sports.  Every single time there was a shot of the crowd, it was 85% really sketchy looking dudes with questionable facial hair choices in XXL jerseys of players long gone.  Then you could count on that guy that has appointed himself as Section Cheerleader who does the upwards arm motion for everyone in his area to either stand up or make some noise.  I get it that this activity provides this fella with purpose, but it sure doesn't help our region's tourism board.  "Come to Cleveland to intermingle with these Wal Mart refugees and eat tube meats."  I had three people I know from other parts of the country call me today to provide feedback on how ugly Browns fans look.  I could not offer any defense.  

Can TV stop covering Verse like he's a superstar player?  It seems like the broadcast crews of all the networks decided to cover the Browns just like they did last year but just X-out "Garrett" and insert "Verse" in their storylines.  He's a fine starting defensive lineman, but why dedicate a camera to a guy that makes one play a game?  It's not like teams are game planning around Verse.  I don't think he's even the best D-lineman on the team (Graham is).  It's a bit unfair for Verse to be expected to slip into a dominant Hall Of Fame edge rusher's shoes and take it from there.  Can someone tell these people to ease it the fuck back on trying to sell us that Verse and Myles are interchangeable?  Verse has seven solo tackles and no sacks.  He ain't no Myles.  Put the camera on Schwesinger.  He's flying around out there.  That's better TV.

The first month of the season could not have gone much better for the Browns.  Watson is playing pretty well and the screaming for Sanders has stopped.  The defense is playing high stakes bend, don't break high pressure blitz pressures, which is fun to watch.  The rookie receivers look like legit players.  Hell, even Jerry Jeudy got some action last night and seemed excited to be included.  Assuming that Graham's knee doesn't fall off, the team looks poised to at least split their next four with Jets/Ravens/Titans/Steelers.  The 14 penalties is brutal.  That's going to eventually catch up to them.  All and all, this is the most fun Browns season since before Baker's shoulder burst.  I don't know how long they can keep it going, but at least I am interested.

Go Browns.