A Wasted Sunday Afternoon

If I would have told you in September that Joe Flacco tossed a late interception to put the final nail in the coffin in a game where Kareem Hunt was the leading ball carrier and Jerome Ford scored a touchdown, the first question you would have probably asked was, "What team was playing?".  The laundry you are watching is wearing the Browns colors, but the team on the field doesn't have much in common with the one that won seven games so far this season.  The Browns are missing 6 of their 11 opening day offensive starters, and it's fairly obvious the team on the field is not exactly elite on that side of the ball.  Shockingly Flacco appeared to be the best of all the Browns QB options this year, which doesn't say much about Watson as Flacco demonstrated only a vague understanding of many of the offensive plays.

You know how for the last two years anytime Watson looked shitty, everyone would be quick to rush in to say, "He's rusty!".  Watson went through two training camps, played 11 games and even after two years the expectation is supposed to be "Give that guy a break!  He's rusty!".  Yet somehow Joe Flacco got up off the couch after not playing a lick in 11 months and threw for 254 yards and a couple TDs.  Flacco played arguably the second best game any Browns QB played this season, which suggests Watson might not be worth $62M a season.  Air Stefanski was back in a big way with Flacco getting 44 passing plays, but to be fair Kareem Hunt has no speed and Ford is too small to muscle for tough yards.  The Browns can't run the ball very well, but that presents a balanced offensive attack as they can't throw it that well either.

The thing is, Stefanski might be doing his best coaching job since he's been in Cleveland.  Seven of the Browns top 10 highest paid players are hurt including all the key positions of QB, edge rusher, left tackle, #1 receiver, #1 corner, and All-Pro running back.  The team on the field can be categorized as "not great".  It's just a random collection of guys on the field. This is basically an early 2000s Browns team with sugar plum aspirations.  Hats off to Stefanski and staff.  This waiver wire Browns were still somehow competitive and had a reasonable chance to win that game.  Of course, this is also an indictment about how crappy the NFL is right now.  I'm sorry.  I just received an urgent communique from the League Office.  I need to edit out that part about "crappy" and put in "parity" or I will be sued until I cry blood.

Can the Browns still make the Playoffs?  Yes.  Does that matter?  No.  It all depends if you want to gather a bunch of people in your house to see a bunch of other players you don't know in Texans/Colts uniforms kick the crap out of whoever is left wearing ugly Browns uniforms after the holidays.  It will be the C-list CBS announcing crew trying to make it sound exciting.  "The Browns really need a first down here so they will probably lean into Brock Davis from tiny Gardiner University, the first D-III quarterback to ever play an NFL Playoff game, and the Browns sixth QB this season.  He was on speaker phone learning the plays from Kevin Stefanski on the drive over here this morning from his apartment in Glenville IL where he has been selling software security.  What a gutty kid!".

I was watching the Browns v Rams game in the third quarter thinking, "Why am I doing this?".  The Browns season at this point is like being in a movie theater watching a Liam Neeson movie 2/3rds in.  You know how the movie ends because the script is so predictable, but you've already invested 75 minutes watching the goddamn thing so you feel like you need to see it through.  You won't enjoy any of it, but you're so committed that you feel like any other option has been eliminated.  In this case, the upcoming car crash/gun fight scene is next Sunday's game against the Jaguars.  

The Browns sort of suck at this point, but the "good news" is that they still play the Bengals and Jets who suck even worse.  If they beat those two teams, a shaky proposition at best, they have a good shot at the Playoffs.  If they beat those two and find a win against Jags/Texans/Bears, they are definitely in.  It should be noted that all of those listed teams suck as bad or nearly as badly as the Browns do, so it's a complete crapshoot.  Really, the main question is, do I want to stare at the screen and pretend 76 year old Liam Neeson is a tough guy capable of great things?

Go Browns.